Comedy Quotes

Comedy Quotes

Samuel Goldwyn

Rating - 3 (1 Votes)

Our comedies are not to be laughed at.

Christopher Fry

Rating - 3 (1 Votes)

In tragedy every moment is eternity; in comedy, eternity is a moment.

Mitch Hedberg

Rating - 3 (1 Votes)

Every time I go and shave, I assume there's someone else on the planet shaving. So I say, 'I'm gonna go shave, too.'

Bill Hicks

Rating - 3 (1 Votes)

You know we armed Iraq. I wondered about that too, you know during the Persian Gulf war those intelligence reports would come out: "Iraq: incredible weapons - incredible weapons." How ...

Bill Hicks

Rating - 3 (1 Votes)

Dinosaur fossils? God put those there to test our faith." Thank God I'm strapped in right now here man. I think God put you here to test my faith, Dude. ...

Sasha Azevedo

Rating - 4 (2 Votes)

The only way I can make a Jim Carrey face is through Novocain at the dentists office.

Jerry Seinfield

Rating - 3 (1 Votes)

I wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?'

Robin Williams

Rating - 3 (1 Votes)

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.

Hilarious, sad, thoughtful or just plain wrong, comedy quotes are an easy way to amuse yourself and express your own thoughts through the words of others. How many times have you heard comedy quotes tossed around in casual conversation? It's impossible to stay completely current on all comedy quotes, but the major ones are easy enough to find. What better way to show how aware you are of the current culture and celebrity than by tossing a few comedy quotes into a conversation with your friends? Having a ready supply of comedy quotes can also come in very handy in a dull conversation when you need to take the conversation an entirely new direction. Our collection of comedy quotes is comprehensive and fun - enjoy them!