Charlie Sheen’s 13 Best Batshit Crazy Quotes

The man with Adonis DNA who drinks tiger blood has been all the rage recently. He’s been winning like crazy on the internets and is plastered on every celebrity gossip site and magazine. You can’t seem to get away from him.

He even recently decided to take his ranting on the road, starting April 3rd he’ll be making stops in Chicago,  Cleveland , Columbus, Boston, Connecticut and New York.

He’s gone and said many a crazy thing on various talk shows, his Twitter account and on his streaming web show Sheen’s Korner. In honor of his new found sobriety and his newly discovered insanity we thought we’d offer up the 13 of his best batshit crazy quotes:

13.) “the title of my book has finally been delivered thru vast and extensive Lunar channels. “Apocalypse Me” Warlock Latin for WINNING. C” – (Twitter )

12.) “Here’s the good news. If I realize that I’m insane, then I’m okay with it. I’m not dangerous insane.” –  (People Magazine)

11.) “It’s $3 million an episode, take it or leave it … Well, yeah, look what they put me through. … I’m underpaid right now. You look at the money they’re making, yeah, it’s ridiculous.” – (The Today Show)

10.) “I fire back once and this contaminated little maggot can’t handle my power and can’t handle the truth. I wish him nothing but pain in his silly travels especially if they wind up in my octagon. Clearly I have defeated this earthworm with my words—imagine what I would have done with my fire-breathing fists.” – (Letter to TMZ)

9.)” But you can’t focus on things that matter if all you’ve been is asleep for forty years. Funny how sleep rhymes with sheep. You know.” – (Alex Jones radio show)

8.) “fastball; this just in, Thomas Jefferson comes forward to sheepishly admit, “Sheen’s right. I am a pussy.” C” – (Twitter)

7.) “I’m sorry, man, but I’ve got magic. I’ve got poetry in my fingertips. Most of the time – and this includes naps – I’m an F-18, bro. And I will destroy you in the air. I will deploy my ordinance to the ground.” – (Alex Jones radio show)

6.) “I mean, what’s not to love? Especially when you see how I party man, it’s epic. The run I was on made Sinatra, Flynn, Jagger, Richards, all of them, just look like droopy-eyed, armless children.” – (20/20)

5.) “I have a 10,000-year-old brain and the boogers of a 7-year-old. That’s how I describe myself.” – (Piers Morgan Tonight)

4.) “I’m tired of pretending I’m not a total bitchin’ rock star from Mars, and people can’t figure me out; they can’t process me. I don’t expect them to. You can’t process me with a normal brain.” -  (The Today Show)

3.) “I will not believe that if I do something then I have to follow a certain path because it was written for normal people. People who aren’t special. People who don’t have tiger blood and Adonis DNA.”  –  (The Today Show)

2.) “I am on a drug. It’s called Charlie Sheen. It’s not available because if you try it once, you will die. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body,”.  – (ABC News Special)

1.)  “I probably took more than anybody could survive. … I was bangin’ seven-gram rocks and finishing them because that’s how I roll, because I have one speed, one gear. … I’m different. I have a different constitution, I have a different brain, I have a different heart. I got tiger blood, man. Dying’s for fools, dying’s for amateurs.” – (20/20)

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